Coming back from Olympia I decided to get off at Covent Garden to look at the market and just as I was about to get on the lift to ground level I heard the famous Inspector Sands annoucement - "Will Inspector Sands please make his way to the control room".
No one in the lift took a blind bit of notice. I however really wanted the lift to hurry up and get to ground level, as "Inspector Sands" is a coded term for a possible fire. If the London Underground shouted out "Fire, Fire, Fire", there'd be mass panic, so they use Inspector Sands instead. Now that I've had a chance to search the net, I've remembered that it doesn't actually mean fire, but that there's a problem with one of the fire points, but the principle is the same.
Just found the recording of Inspector Sands that Nik Fox made.
Thursday, December 4, 2003
Jesus look-a-like on the tube
Left home later today as I was going to an exhibition and conference in Olympia. Just made it onto the District Line at Richmond thanks to flinging my bag and arm in the door and fortunately some bloke decided to help me heave the thing open so I wasn't like the cartoon character below.
An Asian woman in a peach sari then started "busking" at the top of her voice. Well, by busking this meant singing a loud chanting style song. One of the guys near me, gave that startled Tim out of The Office face, when something unbelievable is happening. Unfortunately I was too close to her and also standing so I couldn't take a picture without her demanding money off me.
When she finished and made her way slowly through the carriage, the only person who gave her money was a bearded guy with long hair and a flowing oatmeal coloured floorlength robe sitting in the corner. After he gave her some money he gave her a beautiful smile and said thank you. It slightly shamed me into thinking maybe I should have given her some cash as it's nearly Xmas.
Although if this guy was as Jesus-like as I thought he was, wouldn't he have stood up to give me a seat?
An Asian woman in a peach sari then started "busking" at the top of her voice. Well, by busking this meant singing a loud chanting style song. One of the guys near me, gave that startled Tim out of The Office face, when something unbelievable is happening. Unfortunately I was too close to her and also standing so I couldn't take a picture without her demanding money off me.
When she finished and made her way slowly through the carriage, the only person who gave her money was a bearded guy with long hair and a flowing oatmeal coloured floorlength robe sitting in the corner. After he gave her some money he gave her a beautiful smile and said thank you. It slightly shamed me into thinking maybe I should have given her some cash as it's nearly Xmas.
Although if this guy was as Jesus-like as I thought he was, wouldn't he have stood up to give me a seat?
Geoffrey the Tube Train and the Fat Comedian
Pan from London Lifer got in touch with me yesterday to say that the Santa slashing images and Santa letters from Monday reminded him of the above book.
I sort of know what he means. In the summer my friend Anton told me about this book for the first time and I thought he was on drugs. A graphic novel, about a talking tube train, with a subplot about a fat comedian, and series of grisly murders, by fat comedian Alexei Sayle!!!???.
It sounded too good (or too mad) to be true. A quick search on net and I found that the book really existed but was out of print - D'OH. However, I got a couple of second hand copies through abebooks.co.uk or abebooks.com, or Amazon.
It's a fantastic book for people who like reading about London, tube humour, commuter humour, Alexi Sayle, graphic novels, cartoons, serial killers, Thomas the Tank Engine or the idea of talking tube trains.
I sort of know what he means. In the summer my friend Anton told me about this book for the first time and I thought he was on drugs. A graphic novel, about a talking tube train, with a subplot about a fat comedian, and series of grisly murders, by fat comedian Alexei Sayle!!!???.
It sounded too good (or too mad) to be true. A quick search on net and I found that the book really existed but was out of print - D'OH. However, I got a couple of second hand copies through abebooks.co.uk or abebooks.com, or Amazon.
It's a fantastic book for people who like reading about London, tube humour, commuter humour, Alexi Sayle, graphic novels, cartoons, serial killers, Thomas the Tank Engine or the idea of talking tube trains.
Wednesday, December 3, 2003
Underground Industrial Action - check out the Evening Standard's message board
As we're getting nearer and nearer to the go slows on the tube (8th and 9th December to anyone who came here from Google looking for the dates), you might want to have a look at the very long and let's just say "heated" discussion on the message board for This Is London - the Evening Standard's website. There's comments from commuters and drivers and it get very lively. I haven't read all of it yet as I'll need a bigger cup of coffee, but it contains a few gems such as:
"So how do you justify any strikes then??
THe fact that your pay is now the equivalent to management positions in most industries where you work till the job is finished not down tools the moment you finish your hours.
Customer service.......ever heard of it??
The fact that you let your union be hijacked by a left wing minority and that in strike votes there is a huge silent majority who don't vote but are happy to hide behind the result."
"Safety strikes are always justifiable.
It is worth noticing the high calibre of London Underground Train Operators. There has not been a single serious safety breach in the Train Operators grade for 2 decades (witch co-insides with the increases in living and working conditions within the Train Ops position). The conditions attached to the train operator�s position attract a higher Calibre of employee."
"Safety. THankyou very much for striking on my behalf for safety. However I'm more than happy to take the risk and by your actions you will cause loss of life on the roads due to overcrowding. How kind of you."
"Tell me: Have you ever visited planet Earth? Of course the strikes are about safety! Why the hell would we want to strike about anything other than safety? We have our pay agreement settled for this year. We do not take the decision to strike lightly, because it means we lose a day's salary. The strikes are to wake up London Underground management to the fact that we need 24 hour checks on the system again. Two derailments within days of each other, with many more which the public don't get to hear about and are kept very quiet by LU."
I could go on but as I said earlier read it for yourself and if you feel brave enough to contribute (I'm not) feel free.
"So how do you justify any strikes then??
THe fact that your pay is now the equivalent to management positions in most industries where you work till the job is finished not down tools the moment you finish your hours.
Customer service.......ever heard of it??
The fact that you let your union be hijacked by a left wing minority and that in strike votes there is a huge silent majority who don't vote but are happy to hide behind the result."
"Safety strikes are always justifiable.
It is worth noticing the high calibre of London Underground Train Operators. There has not been a single serious safety breach in the Train Operators grade for 2 decades (witch co-insides with the increases in living and working conditions within the Train Ops position). The conditions attached to the train operator�s position attract a higher Calibre of employee."
"Safety. THankyou very much for striking on my behalf for safety. However I'm more than happy to take the risk and by your actions you will cause loss of life on the roads due to overcrowding. How kind of you."
"Tell me: Have you ever visited planet Earth? Of course the strikes are about safety! Why the hell would we want to strike about anything other than safety? We have our pay agreement settled for this year. We do not take the decision to strike lightly, because it means we lose a day's salary. The strikes are to wake up London Underground management to the fact that we need 24 hour checks on the system again. Two derailments within days of each other, with many more which the public don't get to hear about and are kept very quiet by LU."
I could go on but as I said earlier read it for yourself and if you feel brave enough to contribute (I'm not) feel free.
Love on the tube
My friend just sent me a nice poem by Theresa Turk about lovers on the Piccadilly line which I think applies to the couple I spotted last week.
The lovers on the Underground,
locked eye to eye
and knee to knee,
fly Chagall-like above our heads,
are not aware of you and me.
Unheeded run the station names,
the sweating, red
raw football fans,
the graffiti, the orange peel,
the rolling Coca Cola cans.
Click here to see the final verse.
The lovers on the Underground,
locked eye to eye
and knee to knee,
fly Chagall-like above our heads,
are not aware of you and me.
Unheeded run the station names,
the sweating, red
raw football fans,
the graffiti, the orange peel,
the rolling Coca Cola cans.
Click here to see the final verse.
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